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(Proverbs 31:25-26)
"She is clothed with strength and dignity; She can laugh at the days to come.
She speaks with wisdom, and faithful instruction is on her tongue." |
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| Wednesday, January 17, 2007 |
| redefining friendship in god's terms |
In Philippians 2:19-20 (NLT):
If the Lord Jesus is willing, I hope to send Timothy to you soon for a visit. Then he can cheer me up by telling me how you are getting along. I have no one else like Timothy, who genuinely cares about your welfare.
In the Old Testament two words are more generally translated into "friend" or "companion":
1) re`eh which means a mere associate, passing friend, neighbor, or companion;
2) 'ahabh with the meaning indicating affection natural or unnatural.
In the New Testament, there are also two words:
1) hetairos which can be translated as "a comrade," or "fellow,"
2) philos which suggests a more affectionate relationship.
I was looking and searching and I feel that the word "philos" describe the love Paul had for the church in Philippi. This word is primarily used (sorry for a short english lesson... the affliction of being an english teacher~ :P) as an adjective which means loved dearly, but it was often used as a noun, implying the actual nature of love described in the Bible. In the strictest definition, a friend is someone whom we love dearly with a love that expects nothing in return. Sounds like a tall order huh? That's why only Christ is able to place this kind of love in our hearts for He has loved us so.
Paul wrote this verses as he was imprisoned and was unable to visit his beloved brothers. Yet he hopes to be able send Timothy who was a young and trusted friend and colleague of Paul. It was rather interesting for me to read about how special Paul regarded Timothy. He actually used a phrase "have no one else" except Timothy. So what is so special about Timothy? What can I learn from Timothy about friendship?
Firstly, a real friend must be trustworthy. Paul was sure that Timothy would take care of the welfare of the brothers and sisters in the Church of Philippi. He had no reason to doubt the heart of this special friend. Timothy was trustworthy because he cared for the interests of Christ Jesus (refer to verse 21).
I count myself quite lucky that I have been able to find fellowship of different brothers and sisters who I can trust. Yet I must also ask myself have I been a trustworthy friend? Have I been focused in seeking for the interests of Christ Jesus e.g. speaking the truth in love, calling each other higher in our walk with God and our mission (Proverbs 27:17), etc?
A real friend has to be available. I find this one of my toughest challenges. As I am currently teaching in a school, there are at times meetings that can drag and affect my availability to spend time or do other things. I also find it physically challenging as I get tired rather easily. All this pushes me to have to be so much more organised and disciplined in how I use my time. I have no time to procrastinate AT ALL. And it's totally against my sinful nature. I am used to nua-ing or taking my sweet time in some things I do. Yeah... I can be super efficient but I can be super nua as well... and with my current schedule, I cannot afford to procrastinate. Timothy, with all his duties and obligations and things to do, still had time to listen to Paul in his hour of need. It's not easy. It requires one to be inconvenienced. It requires one to sacrifice. It requires one to accept that whatever effort put in may be wasted (ever try to be there for a friend but was brushed off/ignored/basically unappreciated? I had.). It requires one to surrender to God's will; to accept that whatever you can do is also limited...
A real friend has to be genuine. Ha... Another of my biggest struggles. It took me 2 years before I could really be vulnerable to even my closest friends. Often I only share moments of victories AFTER I struggled, moments of triumph AFTER I went through trials. I never allowed people to get into my life in my down-est moments. Genuine here also means a real concern for the friends or people around us. Often than not, I catch myself having critical thoughts about how this person is treating me; how my friendship is with this brother/sister. Of course, it's natural to have certain basic expectations; however, it's also true that we must be willing for friendships to be one-way sometimes. Some friends are harder to love and a few may never love you back. That's the truth and we need to be surrendered in how friendships with brothers and sisters turn out when we know fully well that we have done our part to the best of abilities. I learnt this lesson thru the hard way with one of my longest best friends. Nevertheless, I am always comforted by the fact that there will always be one friend who will always love me unconditionally. Yep... that's God. In Philippians, Paul commends Timothy to the church at Philippi as a genuine, legitimate friend who is only concerned about the welfare of the believers there.Our motivation must never be "what it does for me" but rather "what it does for you(others)".
Some of the thoughts for these past 2 days... :)Labels: my time with Him |
ranted by Jerraine @ 7:04 AM  |
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| 1 Comments: |
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Friendship is God's gift to mankind...we should always cherish it
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Friendship is God's gift to mankind...we should always cherish it